No Cave Man Am I

     It may come as some surprise to you that I might be one of the few individuals who makes his living in large part from watching sports that I do not, and never have had, a man cave. We do have four televisions in our home, but they are all in separate locations, no way to see even two of them from the same spot. There is one in the guest bedroom, one in the dining room area, one in the den downstairs and one in the basement where I work out.

     Frankly, I have never much cared that I don’t. Man caves are mostly designed with football in mind, and I have spent much of my broadcasting life working on football Saturdays and Sundays. During the week, my wife and I ordinarily watch something other than sports together for a while, and then I catch up on sports on DVR later.

     But then come some days like Saturday that a nice little setup of at least three televisions would have come in handy. Having already devoured Kansas State’s amazing upset of Oklahoma in a time slot where there certainly was other college football, but nothing to really distract from the ‘Cats big win, the evening beckoned.

     Certainly, for me, the focus was going to be on World Series game four, and I wasn’t going to be distracted by flipping around, so I dutifully DVR’d the Missouri-Kentucky and Kansas-Texas Tech games. Kansas started fairly early and the Jayhawks looked like they were going to make their game an irrelevance that needed only brisk viewing by falling behind 17-0, but they would have well inserted themselves back into the game by the time the baseball began.

     Unfortunately for Missouri, they succeeded in placing their game squarely on the DVR back burner by allowing twenty-two consecutive points in the second quarter. But still, it is my job to know what occurs in these games, so some attention would have to be given to it.

          Knowing that the World Series game with my Astros desperately needing a win could easily run towards eleven o’clock, and deciding that I didn’t want to be in channel flipping mode, I wanted to get as much football consumed as possible before focusing solely on Houston and Washington. So, while doing the dishes, I played DVR dance during every break between half-innings up until about 8:15. I DID indeed think about how this would have been a whole lot easier with a different setup.  It was also becoming increasingly clear that the Premier League soccer match that I had recorded during the K-State game was likely to go unwatched.

     I truly enjoy the time that I share with my wife and our two dogs for a couple hours most nights, away from the sports world. But my wife knows that there are certain things that are going to take precedence, and she indulges me for Astros playoff games, and major golf tournaments, and actually enjoys them along with me. But as the Astros pulled away, and the Jayhawks game in the DVR world (although in reality now over) grew compelling, there was more dancing, and that she is no fan of. I’m on her side, I like to focus on one thing, but this was an exception.

     Soon things were growing less frantic. The Astros had the game in the bag, and it was time to complete the second great win by a Sunflower state team on the day as Kansas defeated Texas Tech in a finish for the ages, featuring one of the dumbest football plays in history as a Tech player lateraled the ball back to Kansas in the shadow of his own goalpost after the Jayhawks had a potential game winning kick blocked. Given the second chance they sent fans spilling onto the field with a winner at the buzzer.

     As I was winding down and watching Tiger Woods dominate in Japan in some live television golf, I had another overriding thought. How do these people I know, who are also sports fans, find the time to binge watch shows on the weekend? They either have the most forgiving family members on the planet, or they don’t have anyone to ignore. I’m more curious than jealous.

     I know how many decisions I have to make about things that I decide have to go unwatched, and obviously that has made must-see for others series one of them for me. Many an Emmy award winning series on HBO, Netflicks, or other enterprises has come and gone, with universal discussion that is only white noise to me. I actually know quite a bit about Breaking Bad or Game of Thrones, and I have never seen a second of either show. Pick your favorite long-running epic, and I haven’t indulged. It basically would have been impossible, so I don’t feel like I have really missed anything.

     Tonight will bring a smaller version of the no-man cave conundrum that only very rarely even makes me think about it. The Chiefs and Packers will play simultaneously with Game 5 of the World Series. The Astros are my team, but Chiefs game are important business. One is an indulgence, one is mandatory. Perhaps the arc of the games will make viewing strategy simpler, perhaps they won’t.

     This certainly is my personal version of a first-world problem. First off, ninety five percent of the time, I don’t even have to deal with this so-called challenge. I will gladly accept the five percent that an evening like this will bring.

     Hell, maybe I’ll get to that Liverpool-Tottenham game I recorded earlier.