A Whole Lot of Hole
Depending on where you look, the stated odds of making a hole-in-one are anywhere from about 3,500 to 1, to 25,000 to one. Those numbers reflect the odd nature of golf’s most famous feat, and most random. It is really considered something special, and it should be. But it is unique in the fact that special achievements in most sports require a certain level of accomplishment, whereas the biggest hackers can, and do, make aces, and very accomplished players never do. A hole-in-one can be a truly excellent shot, or freak luck.
There are Hall of Fame golfers like Fred Couples who only have a couple of holes-in-one, and there are mid-handicappers who have several. The official PGA Tour record in competition is ten, shared by Ray Floyd and Robert Allenby. Tigers Woods has twenty, the last recently in a round with his son. There was a man a few years ago who was running around saying he had made over three hundred before his story had giant, uhhh., holes blown in it. And there was the late North Korean dictator Kim Jong-il, who actually released a story to the public stating that he had made five in ONE ROUND!
As far as rules, it’s a tad murky, but there are some standards that are generally agreed on. It should be in a round of golf of at least nine holes. It should be when playing one ball, and there has be a witness. These issues and others came up again for me because of a couple of things that occurred over the past week or so. First, I received a Facebook memory notification that harkened back to the hole-in-one I made in 2014. I’ll get into the details later, but on that rainy day off from work, it allowed me to call in to “Between the Lines” on WHB and further poke my colleague Kevin Kietzman with the tale of what was my third, he never having made one.
Kevin would often lament this on the air and routinely would say he would never make one. He is quite a good player, routinely shooting in the 70’s, but as we know, being a good player is no indicator of the potential of having an ace. Well, his laments are no more as he made one this past Sunday. It was on the par three sixteenth hole at Stone Canyon, a 166-yard seven iron. The vagaries of the game can be seen in the fact that I have played that hole dozens of times, and it is a total bugaboo for me. There is a hazard to the right of the green you really have no business going into if you are reasonably good player, and I would say I have been in there more times than I have hit the green It makes no sense, it is a straightforward, and not particularly difficult hole, but it kills me. That made it a little more fun to hear of Kevin’s accomplishment.
As I mentioned, I have made three. They are the only holes-in-one I have witnessed, and frankly, those three are the only times that I really came that close to doing it. Sure, I have hit the ball inside a couple of feet many times, but I really can’t recall thinking I got robbed on any. I am still a decent player, but I went through a period of time where my job schedule and life circumstance allowed for almost daily play, and I got as low as a 3.4 handicap. But as we have noted, that only makes it a little more likely you can bag the big prize.
Also because of the way may schedule worked through the years, I often play golf by myself, which I don’t mind at all. But what it meant was that in all three cases I needed some mighty good fortune in order to have them witnessed, because in each case, I was playing the round solo. My first hole-in-one came in the early 90’s at Twin Ponds Golf Club in New York Mills, New York. They had teed us off on the tenth that day so the 169-yard par three 8th was my seventeenth hole of the round. On that very hole I caught up with a man and his son, and they asked if I wanted to play the last two with them. On the first shot they saw me hit, I launched a perfect seven iron that hit the front of the downhill green, and rolled slightly right to left right in like a putt. Much rejoicing!
On top of that, we proceeded to the last hole, which was a hard dog leg to the right with trees all the way down on that side. I never tried to blow it over the trees, just hit it down the middle and usually was left with about a 150-yard shot. But this time I hit my drive very well, but pulled it badly. I am left-handed and that big pull actually cleared the trees that I never attempted to scale, severely cut the corner, and left me with a little flip wedge from about 60 yards. I almost holed that, too, and the tap-in birdie meant that they had seen me play those two holes in ace and birdie. Ironically, the father was a good player and we ended up being paired in a regional USGA qualifier later that summer, and it didn’t take long for him to see I wasn’t THAT guy he had witnessed for a fleeting two holes.
The second one came later in the decade at the Orchards Golf Course at Alvamar in Lawrence, Kansas. It is an executive course, a mix of four par fours, and five par threes, so if you want to quibble with this one I won’t argue, but the hole I aced was the ninth which is 143 yards, so I damn well count it. It plays uphill into the wind, so I choked up on a (pattern here) seven iron, and holed it on one hop. Yes, I was playing alone again, but the green is right next to the clubhouse and practice green and there were numerous people who saw it go in. Lucky me again.
And as I mentioned the third (likely final, but we can always dream) came at Painted Hills Golf Club in Kansas City, Kansas. I hardly ever play there. even though it’s only about six miles from where I live, but on this day it was raining off and on, and I decided that ditching the round if the rains persisted would be more convenient close to home. The third hole is a 158-yard par three. As I stepped to the tee it started pouring, a torrential thunderstorm. I grabbed my umbrella, and some bench, and sat there for ten minutes, The rain slowed a bit, and I stepped to the tee a second time, and again it opened up. I sat down again, thinking this might be it for the day. I was about to give up the ghost after another ten minutes when the rain suddenly stopped. I got out a (yes!) seven iron and hit one right at the flag. I knew it was a good shot, but in the gloom it was hard to see, I went to the green, and low and behold, there was a pitch mark about four feet in front of the hole, which held the TaylorMade 2 I have in my hand right now. I also have the Slazenger from my first one, I don’t know what happened to old number two.
Yes, i was playing alone, but again, circumstances were on my side. Another hearty golfer was playing the adjacent par five and he had hit a shot way off line onto my hole, and was standing on the hill waiting for me to play so he could hit his shot. I made him come over and make a note on my scorecard, and take a picture. I don’t know who he is, but he is one of my favorite people. There was one more hurdle, though. By the time i had finished playing the seventh hole, it was raining cats and dogs again. It got unplayable. I limped into the clubhouse to try and wait it out, since I had to finish the nine holes. Almost ninety minutes later, I sloshed my way through the last two holes, and made things official.
I consider myself very lucky to have this tale to tell. I am also very glad that all three of the aces were actually really good shots. Not that I wouldn’t have taken a thinned six-iron that clanged in off the flagstick. In either fashion, I hope that you have, or will, experience the thrill of it. I enjoy living vicariously through the little thing they put in the sports page every day with the aces of local players. I do often wonder if people fiddle with the notation of the club that they hit to make it more impressive, but even if they do, I forgive them.
Scratch player or 100 shooter, it doesn’t matter. The feat is rare enough to be special, but achievable to all. Golf is a sport where the lowliest of player can play a hole kind of like a pro. and no matter how good someone is……
They can’t beat a one.